4 Mistakes to Avoid When Handling Funeral or Cremation Services for a Loved One.

1. Assuming the services are already taken care of.

a. Dad was a vet so they will take care of it. Nope. Sure there are benefits available from the Veterans administration HERE.  But all of them fall short of paying for a funeral or cremation. The main benefits are flag, flag folding, cemetery marker, and eligibility for burial in a national cemetery. There is also some money available if the death was at a VA hospital or nursing home.
b. Well Social Security has a death benefit. Yep…. $255 paid only to a surviving spouse or dependent child. More HERE  Again a far cry from covering the total bill.
c. Mom said she pre-planned everything. Hopefully she pre-paid too. Several items come up in this scenario.
– Mom visited with a funeral director but never finalized anything.
– Mom has her cemetery plots taken care of and to her that was “having everything set up.”
– Mom has life insurance to cover the expenses. Great. Did she change the beneficiary from Dad to the children when he passed. Otherwise the money will get paid to the estate and most funeral directors will not wait on an estate to pay the bill.
d. Mom’s Will says the estate will pay the funeral bill. Ok see above ^.

2. Paying Too Much.

When a death occurs the first thing that most families do is to call the “family funeral director” (you know the guy that buried, Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Mike, Aunt Tille, etc…..) make an appointment, meet with the staff, arrange the service and walk out with a $10,000 + bill. But wait, we shop around for everything else why not take a moment to make some phone calls. A funeral home is required by federal law to disclose their prices prior to any discussion about services and merchandise. Ask about the price, payment methods, payment plans etc. It is powerful to have some knowledge of prices in the area.

3. Not having a service.

It has been shown that when a family chooses not to have a service that there isn’t proper time to mourn the loss, share memories and gather with family and friends. All of which will help with recovering from the loss. During the pandemic when Funeral services were limited we encouraged families to have a small intimate gathering. Then follow that up with a memorial service once the restrictions were relaxed. You don’t need to pay a funeral home for a memorial service that you can handle yourself. See tips on a “Do it yourself memorial service” HERE 

4. Not understanding who is in charge.

A few times a year we will get a phone call from a person trying to make arrangements for a cremation/funeral. That person thinks they are able to make the arrangements, however, the State of Pennsylvania makes it clear who is able to make those decisions. Details HERE.  and Here  Most of the issues arise when a significant other (boyfriend, girl friend, domestic partner) wants to handle the arrangements. However, unless they are legally married they have no legal right to be in charge of the arrangements. Other times it will be a child calling to make arrangements for a parent. Two scenarios come up in this situation: 1. The parent is separated and not legally divorced so the person in charge is still the separated spouse, or 2. The deceased had multiple children, and in this case all the children have to be in agreement. There are ways around these situations but its best to know what is what ahead of time.

Now that you know the mistakes to avoid when making cremation or funeral arrangements for a loved one perhaps it is time to get some decisions handled ahead of time. Call us to today 1-844-552-6739 or VISIT to start pre-planning your services or for those of a loved one.

Here is an info graphic to better explain what a death certificate is, how do you get them, and who needs one.

Who is Heritage Cremation Provider and how do they operate?

Heritage Cremation Providers (also known as Legacy Funeral Service) are NOT licensed funeral directors or even a funeral home or crematory in Pennsylvania. They are registered in Colorado which is the only state that does NOT require a funeral home or a funeral director to have a license. (Which means anyone can open a funeral home in Colorado with no training or education.) They handle the inquiry from a family and coordinate cremation services by doing trade services through  Pennsylvania funeral homes. Their pricing is misleading and there are many complaints  in which families are quoted a lower price and then asked to pay a much higher final price. The worst part is  that they NEVER handle the deceased’s body. 

Don’t take my word for it, Here are the complaints and legal actions.

The company has had so many complaints about its level of service that the the Better Business Bureau has ranked it as a grade D.

Better Business Bureau Reviews

Complaints Rise Over Colorado-Based Cremation Firm Operating Illegally In California

Florida Department of Financial Services filed a cease-and-desist order against Heritage Provider LLC.

Minnesota family find trouble with Heritage

And the two men behind the company???

Anthony Joseph (A.J.) Damiano and Joseph Damiano have been personally in trouble.

Story here

We are not at all like Heritage.

We are fully licensed as a facility in Pa. Our staff is fully licensed, certified and educated. We handle each cremation in our privately owned crematory and make our own transfers. Should a family have a death in an area outside of the range our personal staff can handle, we use only vetted licensed staff in that area to handle your loved one. Ultimately your loved one will be brought to our facility.

License numbers for verification:  Corey Strauch FD and Supervisor FD015100

If you would to like to discuss this further or find out about the cremation packages we offer please feel free to contact us. 

 

It is somewhat of a misconception that the Department of Veterans Affairs will pay for the funeral of a veteran. In actuality, the closest they come to paying for the full funeral is in the case of an active duty serviceman’s death in the line of duty. What we will cover here is a simplified list of the benefits available from the VA to a veteran.

A. Any veteran having any active or reserve duty service and having been discharged from service, other than a dishonorable discharge, is entitled to: A flag, flag folding team, and a cemetery flag holder

B. Any veteran having served at least 2 years active duty is entitled to the benefits above plus a cemetery marker (bronze, granite, or marble), burial in a national cemetery and a vault (there will be no charge for the plot, opening, or vault). These are provided to the veteran, a spouse, and dependent child(ren).

C. Any veteran having died in a VA medical hospital or nursing facility, or who is receiving a medical disability from the service or who is eligible or currently receiving a military pension is entitled all the benefits listed above plus: a sum of money between $300 and $1000 to cover the transportation from the place of death to the funeral home, a plot allowance, and the transportation to the cemetery or final disposition. The amount of the reimbursement is dependent on a number of factors.

D. Any veteran having served active duty during a war time period is entitled to the benefits listed in A and B plus a county VA benefit of $100 towards the final services. This benefit also extends to the death of a spouse of said veteran and the benefit is paid the family.

Here is a link to the Department of Veterans Affairs website for a more detail accounting of the benefits available: www.benefits.va.gov/compensation/claims-special-burial.asp

The simple answer is the Next of Kin. The harder question to answer may be “Who is the Next of Kin?” In Pennsylvania, the next of kin, according to PA Title 20, are listed as follows: a living spouse who is legally married; if there is no living spouse then all adult children, if no adult children then all parents, if no parents then all siblings, if no siblings then all nieces and nephews.

The law is clear that for cremation, all next of kin of the same level need to be in agreement. For example if a deceased has 4 children and one child is not in agreement to the cremation, then the cremation cannot be performed. A judge will need to give a ruling and in most cases the judge will rule with the next of kin who were closest to the deceased.

The law also allows a person to name someone other than the next of kin to authorize their cremation. The document is called a Statement of Contrary Intent and in short this document is used to go above the next of kin as set forth in Title 20. How can this be helpful? In certain situations a person may want to name one of their children as the authorizing agent thereby streamlining the process. Or in certain situations, a person may want to name a “partner” or “significant other” who is not covered as a next of kin and would be unable to provide the authorization.

One way is to bring personal items into the memorial service location to be displayed in or near the urn or focal point. Example: An artist could have their artwork displayed. A frequent golfer might have a favorite putter placed in front. A person who quilted could have the memory table draped with a quilt they made. A keen hunter or fisherman might have some of their personal effects or trophies displayed on a memory table. A person’s favorite rocking chair could be brought to the memorial service location and placed next to the urn. Also, if the person was an avid baker, their favorite treats could be baked and distributed to guests or the recipes could be printed and handed out.

At the funeral home, a memory table may be used to display personal items of the deceased. A memory board would have a collection of family photographs attached and can be displayed on an easel at the funeral home for visitors to reminisce about their life experiences with the deceased.

In conjunction with, or sometimes in place of, a clergy person, family or friends may share personal thoughts, memories, and feelings about the deceased as part of the service.

Children grieve just as adults do. Any child old enough to form a relationship will experience some form of grief when a relationship is severed. As adults we may not view a childs behavior as grief as it often is demonstrated in ways which we misunderstand as “moody”, “cranky”, “withdrawn” or other behavioral patterns which do not appear to us to be grief. When a death occurs children need to be surrounded by feelings of warmth, acceptance and understanding. This may be a tall order to expect of the adults who are experiencing their own grief and upset. Caring adults can guide children through this time when the child is experiencing feelings for which they have no words and thus can not identify. In a very real way, this time can be a growth experience for the child, teaching about love and relationships. The first task is to create an atmosphere in which the child’s thoughts, fears and wishes are recognized. This means that they should be allowed to participate in any of the arrangements, ceremonies and gatherings which are comfortable for them. First, explain what will be happening and why it is happening at a level the child can understand. A child may not be able to speak at a grandparent’s service but would benefit greatly from the opportunity to draw a picture to be placed next to the urn at the service. Be aware that children will probably have short attention spans and may need to leave a service or gathering before the adults are ready. Many families provide a non-family attendant to care for the children in this event. The key is to allow the participation, not to force it. Forced participation can be harmful. Children instinctively have a good sense of how involved they wish to be. They should be listened to carefully.

While most services are held in the morning or afternoon, some families are now choosing to have services held in the evening hours for the convenience of family and friends. This enables more people to attend the service who otherwise might be unable to be excused from their place of employment during the day.